3 words we all want to hear...

There are three words everyone wants to hear. No matter who you are, where you are or what you are doing, these words will brighten your day. They will take the doom and gloom away and replace it with sunshine with the heavens. For some, they don't hear it enough and are left being jealous of those who do. For others they hear it too much and become bloated, and even dependent, on the warmth it brings to ones body. Luckily, Sanchez Alfonso has been hearing these magical three words since he can remember.

Of course, these three words are,

"It's drinking time!"

There are many reasons to drink; funerals, weddings, birthdays, weekends and boredom to name a few. But what really matters, is not the why, but the who with. And today's lesson in life comes from an experience Sanchez experienced when he was only 12.

At 12 years of age, Sanchez was an established drinker, recognised throughout his small village for his ability to down 14 cruisers in one night and still be able to clearly ununciate his displeasure with the final battle of Harry Potter 7. On one particular night though, he was drinking with a friend he hadn't seen since the removal of all gypsies from the village, in which his closest friend, Mannix Kieushaw, was thought to have been killed. However, Mannix had instead escaped with gypsies and grown up with them only to return to the village 5 years later.

Upon his arrival, Sanchez walked straight up to Mannix, looked him in the eye and whispered, "It's drinking time!" And thus, the night was launched. Two best friends reuniting over quite a few cruisers, it seemed like a scene from a movie. Unfortunately, there was no happy ever after. Soon after finishing his 14th cruiser and embarking on outrageous expletive-ridden rant about the final battle, Sanchez looked down at Mannix. He was shocked by what he was seeing. He had been betrayed! Mannix had returned to the village a different person, he was no longer the young boy Sanchez used to play pin the tail on the real donkey with. He was a monster. Sanchez was horrified, his fear froze him. A million thoughts going through his head, he could not be caught at this scene, the village people would cast him out along with Mannix. He did what any full grown man would have done, he turned and he ran.

Sanchez finally reached his shanty when he collapsed into his bed. He had never felt so alone, his oldest friend had betrayed one of the villages oldest rules. Punishable by banishment from the village, or being forced to do women's chores for a week. Needless to say, nearly all male offenders chose to be banished. The sight of Mannix was etched into his mind. He was sitting there, blissfully ignorant, sipping a glass of water. Water! Who drinks water whilst drinking? It went against human nature, it brought the act of drinking into disrepute! To this day Sanchez has never recovered from what happened, some say he never will...