Once up a time, in a land far far away, a little boy by the name of Sanchez Alfonso lived his life in a way many others could only dream. It was the summer of 2010, he was young and impressionable but most importantly, he was Sanchez Alfonso. The name was known among men and women throughout the world. Everyday, Sanchez would wake up, look in the mirror, look up and down and say to himself, "So this is what perfection looks like..."
His life was one of fantasy, mystery and intrigue. On one particular day he walked the streets of his town. Everything was as it always way, women walked past staring at him and gasping, instantly orgasming and occasionally screaming his name at the top of their considerable lungs. Yes this was how Sanchez lived his life. But on this day, the most perculiar and astonishing - how should I say this? - phenomenom occurred. As Sanchez strode along the footpath to the sounds of orgasms and screams of his name, one woman walked past and looked him straight in the eye. He looked deep into her brown eyes, they almost invited you in, and she gazed straight back but suddenly, the connection was broken. She had rolled her eyes. A woman had rolled her eyes at Sanchez Alfonso...
Well I don't think I have to tell you that this is unheard of. And was Sanchez going to take this lying down? No sirry.
He spun on his heel, strode after he and when he reached her he spoke in his most dominant voice, "Excuse me miss, I can't help but notice that you rolled your eyes at me. May I enquire as to whether you know who I am?" She stood there, clearly unintimidated by this confrontation, and when she spoke it was with a cold sharp voice that cut straight through Sanchez, "Mr. Alfonso, I do know who you are and I think you are despicable!"
Sanchez smiled. He humbly said, "My apologies miss, I did not mean to be rude, have a good day." As he turned to go, he felt her reach out and grab his arm. He looked back. "I apologise Mr. Alfonso, it is that time of month, and you know how retarded us women get, and I should not have snapped. You truly are a great and humble man", she said.
Sanchez heard these words. He digested them, analysed them and finally, with all his wisdom, experience and humility he look deep into her eyes and said,
"Ha bitch! I'm not sorry! Sanchez Alfonso doesn't apologise to anyone. Now go make me a sandwich and be quick with it woman!"
And with that, he was gone. Does anyone know that feeling you get when you are the greatest human alive? Well obviously you wouldn't, Sanchez is the greatest. Well as he resumed his walk down the street, once more to cries of "Sanchez!" and orgasmic moans, that feeling was coursing through his veins. The woman now knew her place. He would sleep easy tonight.
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